Won't You Be My (loud, annoying, overachieving) Neighbor!?

So I've been working from home for the last 2 months. Being that it is Autumn, I have really tried to enjoy the weather by having the doors and windows open. Unfortunately, my neighbors (1 next door and 1 backyard) have both simultaneously retired. Apparently, retired men sign some sort of agreement to work for hours at a time, outside of their home ... very LOUDLY.

I have made the mad dash to slam the back door while trying to also talk to a client because the backyard neighbor busts out the leaf blower...apparently, there were a few rogue pine needles that had not been blown into submission in his earlier venture. This was not as simple as it would seem....I am working through a VoIP phone that is used with a headset tethered to the laptop. In trying to slam the door before the client on the other end of the phone hears the whirring of a leaf blower frantically trying to blow every speck of dust off of a driveway, I give myself whiplash because I fail to remember my whole self is attached to the computer. While injuring myself I manage to also knock over my hot coffee in it's personalized travel mug....that I failed to close. I watch helplessly (because my feet, head and possibly one of the cats is tangled in the cord from the headset) as the coffee glugs out onto the carpet.

I untangle myself, clean up the coffee while saying some choice words and lamenting the fact that I have to go make MORE coffee.

WHEW, okay...rough start to the morning but I settle back in and get started. Then....wait....what is that noise? Is it a steam engine? Is it a pile driver? Ahhh, it's the next door neighbor with his sledge hammer. Apparently, he's deemed it appropriate to break apart the concrete BY HAND WITH A SLEDGE HAMMER. Really? Really!
So I escape up to the desk in my room to see if it helps. The answer is a resounding "NO!"

As he's obviously assigned some yard care tasks to his sons who are now mowing the lawn and, when able, bouncing a basketball repeatedly against the garage door.

I retreat back to the kitchen table, close all the doors and windows, crank up the ceiling fans and get back to work. All of a sudden this "putt putt putt" noise breaks through all the doors and windows, sounds like a steam engine locomotive starting up?!?! What kind of neighborhood is this? What have I been missing by working outside of the home? What do these people DO?!

I peer down through the backyard to the neighbors 2 houses down...I see some sort of old-fashioned John Deere tractor (obviously used for antique shows or something). Now I hear "putt putt putt....BANG, BANG (sledge hammer)....thud, thud (basket ball)....whirrrr, whirrr (leaf blower)....raaawwwwwr (lawn mower).

*Sigh* I throw in the towel, put on a ball cap and head for Liquid Highway. At least the sound of an espresso/cappuccino machine is somewhat soothing....and I still need to replace the coffee I spilled.....

As I leave the neighborhood, I have this sneaking suspicion that all noise will cease and things will return to a peaceful hum. I will never know, however. It's a little like wondering if the light in the refrigerator really goes off when you shut the door....